The question of worthiness…

We live in a society from the day that we’re born that tells us we’re not enough: we’re not good enough, we’re not attractive enough, we’re not tall enough, we’re not skinny enough, we’re not this enough, we’re not that enough, not smart enough. For teenage girls, they see magazines constantly and billboards - and not just girls, boys as well - and so instead of living in a society that feeds us positivity and feeds us worthiness, it feeds us destruction and it feeds us insecurity…

—Shailene Woodley (Award winning American Actress, who began modelling at age 4)

According to my favourite therapist, worthiness destruction often begins in the home. My brother and I were recently comparing notes on the things our parents used to say to us. My brother was made to feel less than because he didn’t complete his 4 year college degree and I was told that I wasn’t as smart as my brother. To which I responded, “yeah, he has that IQ/near photographic memory thing, but I have more of the EQ skills (emotional intelligence)”. It’s just interesting to me that despite our individual successes, we were compared to each other, and our perceived “weaknesses” were highlighted, rather than our strengths. Judgments and comparisons continue on at school, at work, and in our social circles through gossip and back chatter. So on some level, I supposed were left to build our own confidence and self-esteem. My therapist would go a step further, I think, and say that we need to build our self-acceptance and self love, full stop. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO 

Blessings,

Chatgirl