Acknowledging the positives is a way to remember all that is good about life. However, as with everything, there can be too much of a good thing. This includes what is called “toxic positivity,” which is the relentless focus to only concentrate on the good, at the cost of ignoring all of the bad.
— Rachel Fairbank
The emotions that you’re feeling, that we feel, when we deny them, double down. They burrow. They fester. They metastasize. Not only do our feelings double down and grow, they invite shame over for the party.
— Brene Brown
My favourite therapist taught me about this many years ago. He said “You want everything to be sunny and sunnier, and I get that, but what you’re missing is the critical information that comes from acknowledging and feeling the ‘negative’ emotions. He said this left me with a bit of a broken compass and he was right. Once I became brutally honest (with myself that is) about how I was feeling, I began to draw better boundaries. I learned to say no. I put my health and well being ahead of pleasing people. What a big relief actually, and no big fall out in particular. I found people were pretty kind when I explained that I needed a brain fart day, or needed extra rest and sleep that day. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
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