Beneath each behaviour is a feeling, and a need…

Beneath each behaviour there is a feeling. 

And beneath each feeling is a need.

And when we meet that need, rather than focus on the behaviour, we begin to deal with the cause, not the symptom.

— Ashleigh Warner (Family Psychologist, who believes that the “answers for each family aren’t held in a set of pre-prescribed parenting rules; they are found within the parents themselves.”)

I ended up in intensive therapy to save my marriage, and soon learned that I was indeed part of the problem. I was immediately diagnosed with a father issue and a “loveability” issue. My therapist claimed that he would likely be the first male I would ever trust in my life. He was right. My parents were both heavy handed in their child rearing, with little to no focus on praise and positive encouragement. It was tough love all the way, and this left me with a broken compass, according to my therapist. Therapy changed my life for the better, in every respect. I have since thrived in my career and finances. I also met the love of my life, and more importantly, our relationship is built on respect, healthy boundaries and loving and empathetic communication. Just sayin’ :) Hugs and good luck. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl