Sometimes it takes an overwhelming breakdown to have an undeniable breakthrough.
— Unknown
My biggest financial/career (and relationship too actually) breakdown left me no choice but to get entrepreneurial real quick. I didn’t experience overnight success, but I’ve stayed the course and I’ll die tryin’ because I really love working for myself. I enjoy the strategy, creativity and outside the box thinking. Just sayin’ :) Hugs XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
I get by with a little help from my friends...
— The Beatles
Thank goodness for Zoom, iPhones, streaming channels etc. because with all the lock downs, we’re doing without a LOT, including our complete circle of friends and loved ones. Love and hugs to us all. Let’s hang in there. Just sayin’ :) XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Surround yourself with people that push you to do better. No drama or negativity. Just higher goals and higher motivation. Good times and positive energy. No jealousy or hate. Simply bringing out the absolute best in each other.
— Warren Buffett (American investor, business tycoon, philanthropist, and the chairman and CEO of Berkshire Hathaway. He is considered one of the most successful investors in the world and has a net worth of over US$85.6 billion as of December 2020, making him the world’s fourth-wealthiest person).
Thanks to my trusted psychologists/life coaches, my most successful relationships are defined by courageous, open and kind communication, which has paved the way for trust, safety, understanding and hope for the future. Just saying’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
92% of people who set New Year’s resolutions don’t achieve them. Here are some insights on how to be the 8% that do.
Step 1: Don’t call them goals... use a different word: intention. Focus on elements within your control: your mindset, decisions and actions.
Step 2: Immerse yourself in gratitude for the loving/supportive people around you and celebrate all that you achieved in the past year (stayed healthy, got in touch with old friends, pivoted well, given the ongoing changes?).
Step 3: realign expectations and consider asking the most important people around you what they need from you. Surprisingly, this may take the pressure off and reduce the load.
Step 4: ask these four questions: 1) How will I know when this intention is achieved? 2) Can I accomplish this within 12 months? 3) Do I have access to the decision makers I need to influence in order to manifest my intention. If not, consider changing the intention to “expand my network/influence”. 4) What scares me about this intention? If the answer is “nothing,” please push yourself. We only grow outside of our comfort zone. These 4 questions will ensure that the intention is timely, measurable, within our realm of influence and ambitious enough.
— Tiffany Dufu (Founder and CEO of The Cru... paraphrased from her article, How to Set Goals You’ll Actually Achieve).
One of my coaches taught me about intention setting a few years back. I was in a pivotal place and realized I was in need of a much more fulfilling job and a far better romantic match/partnership. She told me to write out what I envisioned in my perfect job. What do my days look like? How does my manager/the company treat me? What are my hours/schedule? How does this position affect my personal life and my finances? How do I feel in this position? She told me to go through the same exercise when considering my ideal mate. How do we spend our days? How does he treat me? How do I feel in this relationship? This exercise worked like a charm for career and love! Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
I’m not going to change the way I look or the way I feel to conform to anything. I’ve always been a freak. So I’ve been a freak all my life and I have to live with that, you know. I’m one of those people.
— John Lennon
I think we’re all freaks in our own way. (For example, my neatness and organization definitely lean to the OCD side. My boyfriend, and those who know me well would agree). Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Whatever truth we feel compelled to withhold
No matter how unthinkable it is
to imagine ourselves telling it
Not to is a way of spiritually holding our breath
You can only do it for so long
— Mark Nepo (Ph.D/professor of English at State University of New York for 18 years. Nepo is also a poet, spiritual advisor and author of the New York Times #1 bestseller The Book of Awakening. Nepo has published 12 books and recorded six audio projects. He speaks from his personal awakening, facing down cancer).
My own family comes to mind. My parents screamed and yelled, rather than expressing their truths. Looking back on it, I can see that they were both deeply unhappy in the marriage. They married extremely young, as so many couples did back in those days. My father was angry and my mother was depressed. Their unhappiness erupted often, but didn’t lead to much resolution unfortunately. I just don’t think most of us come to the table with helpful communication/relationship skills. We don’t tend to know how to express our feelings and we don’t necessarily know how to ask for what we need and want. So much sits unsaid in relationships, unless we’re willing to learn how to speak openly with one another. I’m still learning how to do this. It’s certainly a process if you haven’t seen some of these skills modelled in earlier life. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Have we realized it yet? That nobody is missing the material things. We all miss the company of others, great conversations, and a hug... that’s what life is all about.
— Joshua Becker (Best-selling author of More of Less and The Minimalist Home. Becker says “My family and I began donating, recycling, and removing our unnecessary personal possessions. We embarked on an intentional journey to own less stuff. As a result, we discovered more money, more time, more energy, more freedom, less stress, and more opportunity to pursue our greatest passions; faith, family, friends. And we decided to write about it”).
I had no choice but to embark on a similar path post 2008 financial crisis. Work was largely on pause and I suddenly had to live on much less than I was used to. This forced me out of my cherished habit of shopping for new wardrobe/home treasures. I’m not gonna lie. This was really hard at first. I felt deprived and sat in the void for a bit. There’s a failure in not having the freedom of funds. But I soon filled my time with the activities I love doing (writing, exercising, analyzing film, finding new music, spending time with friends, enjoying nature etc). This became such a habit that I never really got back to the hobby of buying new items. Sure, I select a few fashionable pieces here and there, but only what I feel I really need. This creates space in the budget for more warm vacations (which I desperately need!) and savings (which I realize I also need - for bigger future choices/retirement etc!). Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
