Pause before judging.
Pause before assuming.
Pause before accusing.
Pause whenever you’re about to react harshly and you’ll avoid doing and saying things you’ll later regret.
— Lori Deschene
One of the best lessons I’ve ever learned is to listen with curiosity. My default used to be somewhat defensive, as I felt I was being judged and criticized. I know now that there is always room to learn and evolve, and be the better for it. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
I was thinking about the GPS in my car. It never gets annoyed at me. If I make a mistake, it says “Recalculating.” And then it tells me to make the soonest left turn and go back.
I thought to myself, you know, I should write a book and call it “Recalculating” because I think that’s what we’re doing all the time, that something happens, it challenges us and the challenge is, OK, so do you want to get mad now?... There’s a fork in the road here. I could become indignant; I could flame up this flame of negativity or I could say, “Recalculating. I’ll just go back there.”
— Sylvia Boorstein (from the podcast On Being, where Krista Tippett interviews writer and Buddhist teacher Boorstein).
What a helpful analogy in this tumultuous Covid time. Just sayin’ :) Hugs XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Some would argue that human attention, not money, is the most valuable commodity there is. It’s the ultimate scarce resource... Data showed that the farther away students placed their phone while studying, the higher their grades. If you’re trying to control your attention, don’t just try to do it with willpower. You need to hack your physical space.
— Angela Duckworth (Author of Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance and founder and scientific director of Character Lab, a nonprofit that connects researchers with educators).
So many people I’ve talked to lately are struggling with “Covid brain.” Some common descriptions are; foggy headed, inability to concentrate, lack of motivation, forgetfulness, moodiness, lack of hope, sadness at having nothing to look forward to. Good thing is, we’re not alone. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Even the most conflict-averse among us will inevitably end up in a difficult, tense conversation now and again. No matter the topic — politics, ethics, business strategy — we can prepare for this moment by embracing what Harvard’s Francesca Gino refers to as conversational receptiveness. Among other things, this involves actively working to make sure you understand and acknowledge your conversation partner’s point of view, even if you don’t agree with it. Such openness yields dividends, according to Gino’s research, paving a path to agreement and continued discussion.
— Scott Osler, Editor at LinkedIn News
My favourite therapist incorporates a “clearing” education and practice session in his weekend relationship seminars. He says if we’re feeling discomfort with someone in our relationship world, we would do well to address the issue. He says if we can articulate how we’re feeling, the other person will likely respond with curiosity and compassion. Expressing our feelings is also an act of self care or “having our own back.” Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
People always think that the most painful thing in life is losing the one you value. The truth is, the most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of valuing someone too much and forgetting that you are special too.
— Unknown
I wish I could tell my younger self... but it’s never too late to value ourselves properly. My biggest heartbreaks have led me to more personal stability and fulfilment than I could have imagined. The love of my life and healthiest relationship followed. Love and thanks to my past partners/relationships. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
The average person’s mind wanders 47 percent of the time, according to a 2010 Harvard study, so nearly half the time you’re doing one thing, you’re thinking about something else. Add in the 24-hour news cycle, the barrage of social media and the countless distractions for those working from their bedrooms, backyards and walk-in closets — a number that has more than quadrupled from 8.2 percent in February 2020 to 35.2 percent in May 2020, according to research from the Federal Reserve Bank of Dallas — and it’s no surprise that people are struggling to focus.
— Caren Osten Gerszberg
I don’t know about you, but it makes me feel better knowing many others are struggling with focus while working in atypical spaces. I have a feeling we’re coping pretty well, considering. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Your energy introduces you before you even speak.
— Unknown
I’m a big believer in energies. Some days I know I need to hide and figure out what’s bringing me down. Just sayin’ :) Hugs XO
Blessings,
Chatgirl
