There are so many cliche sayings, like "you get out what you put in" or "garbage in garbage out." Thing is, unless a sentiment hits home, they're only words. I'm not sure why, but the most significant transformations tend to stem from a personal trajedy or moment of profound pain. I've read that we are moved to great change when someone significant comes into our lives, or when they leave. I had one such experience. For three months I wanted to hide under my covers. Luckily, I did the opposite. I was in bed each night at eight pm for sure (hiding from people), but I did not hide from myself. I read and read and read. I also sought the assistance of three coaches from different walks of life. I had made a decision. No more "wrong" relationships. No more settling. No more denying of my deepest truths. No more jamming the square peg into the round hole. I finally understood that in order to live with someone in romantic happiness, there needs to be a match up of the most important aspects of life; mutual attraction, common lifestyle choices (I believe in a critical mass of commonality, otherwise you begin to live separate lives), common beliefs and values, mutual like (otherwise you make faces behind each others' backs and then you eventually snipe at each other in front of your friends and family. Embarrassing for everyone). There are more, but I think this list has the makings of a solid foundation. In summary, I followed my favourite therapists advice and started having my own back, all the way. This means being honest about who we are, what we need and want and standing by our values and beliefs no matter what. Even if it means losing the hot guy. Just sayin'
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Thursday, August 31, 2017
Wednesday, August 30, 2017
Wanting...
Right now, at this moment, what do you want most?
- Unknown
Hmmmmm. Great question. It all starts with wanting and motivation, doesn't it? Just sayin' ;)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Tuesday, August 29, 2017
Brilliantly disguised opportunities...
We are continually faced by great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems.
- Lee Iacocca (Automobile Executive best known for spearheading the development of the Ford Mustang and then reviving the Chrysler Corporation as it's CEO during the 80's. He has also authored and co-authored several books).
Sometimes all we need is a fresh perspective. I'm not sure why this is so difficult, but I guess we need to find a way to get outside of our own heads. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Lee Iacocca (Automobile Executive best known for spearheading the development of the Ford Mustang and then reviving the Chrysler Corporation as it's CEO during the 80's. He has also authored and co-authored several books).
Sometimes all we need is a fresh perspective. I'm not sure why this is so difficult, but I guess we need to find a way to get outside of our own heads. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Monday, August 28, 2017
Planting seeds...
They tried to bury us. They didn't know we were seeds.
- Mexican Proverb
Set backs can stop us in our tracks, that's for sure. Interestingly enough, so many great things, including critical inventions, have come from "mistakes." I guess it's all in how we look at it. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Mexican Proverb
Set backs can stop us in our tracks, that's for sure. Interestingly enough, so many great things, including critical inventions, have come from "mistakes." I guess it's all in how we look at it. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Sunday, August 27, 2017
Momentary defeats...
If you allow momentary defeats to find shelter in your heart, you are allowing your most beautiful dreams to become homeless.
- Dodinksky, In the Garden of Thoughts
So poetic. Life takes a LOT of perseverance and stamina, that's for sure. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Dodinksky, In the Garden of Thoughts
So poetic. Life takes a LOT of perseverance and stamina, that's for sure. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Saturday, August 26, 2017
Today's the day to live...
There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to love, believe, do and mostly live.
- Dalai Lama
This one seems to take a lot of reminders because we do stress don't we. Just sayin' ;) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
This one seems to take a lot of reminders because we do stress don't we. Just sayin' ;) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Friday, August 25, 2017
Thanking failures and tears...
When I reach the place of my dreams, I will thank my failures and tears. They too, kept me going.
- Dodinsky, In the Gargen of Thoughts
It has occured to me lately that everything in our past has contributed to who we are, both the good and the "bad." Even the so-called "wrong" relationships and the trauma's of childhood have allowed us to learn and grow. Hopefully we've become the stronger and happier for it. If not, well, it's just the journey of life and I guess we need to allow for imperfections and less than stellar moments. Just sayin' ;) Hugs. xo
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Dodinsky, In the Gargen of Thoughts
It has occured to me lately that everything in our past has contributed to who we are, both the good and the "bad." Even the so-called "wrong" relationships and the trauma's of childhood have allowed us to learn and grow. Hopefully we've become the stronger and happier for it. If not, well, it's just the journey of life and I guess we need to allow for imperfections and less than stellar moments. Just sayin' ;) Hugs. xo
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Tuesday, August 22, 2017
Balancing act...
Be there for others, but never leave yourself behind.
- Dodinsky (Author of NY Times bestselling book In the Garden of Thoughts, a collection of inspiring and thoughtful messages).
It's a balancing act, that's for sure. There's only so much time and energy and we do need to make sure our own affairs are in order. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Dodinsky (Author of NY Times bestselling book In the Garden of Thoughts, a collection of inspiring and thoughtful messages).
It's a balancing act, that's for sure. There's only so much time and energy and we do need to make sure our own affairs are in order. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Monday, August 21, 2017
Saying yes means sometimes saying no...
Saying yes to happiness means learning to say no to things and people that stress you out.
- Unknown
I don't know about everyone else, but I've found saying no to be a challenge at times. Letting someone down doesn't feel great, even if it takes a personal toll. I guess we have to weigh things out and decide on a case by case basis. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Unknown
I don't know about everyone else, but I've found saying no to be a challenge at times. Letting someone down doesn't feel great, even if it takes a personal toll. I guess we have to weigh things out and decide on a case by case basis. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Sunday, August 20, 2017
Leaders...
When I talk to managers I get the feeling that they are important.
When I talk to leaders I get the feeling that I am important.
- Tom Bresnahan (Offensive Coordinator, Football Consultant)
It's kinda like the advice "spend less time trying to be interesting and more time being interested." The movie When the Game Stands Tall features real life coach Bob Ladouceur, who took the De La Salle High School Spartans from obscurity to a 151-game winning streak that shattered all records for any American sport. He did this by mentoring each individual player to his personal best game and most promising future. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
When I talk to leaders I get the feeling that I am important.
- Tom Bresnahan (Offensive Coordinator, Football Consultant)
It's kinda like the advice "spend less time trying to be interesting and more time being interested." The movie When the Game Stands Tall features real life coach Bob Ladouceur, who took the De La Salle High School Spartans from obscurity to a 151-game winning streak that shattered all records for any American sport. He did this by mentoring each individual player to his personal best game and most promising future. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Saturday, August 19, 2017
Awareness...
Awareness is like the sun.
When it shines on things,
they are transformed.
- Thich Nhat Hahn
As they say in AA, admitting you have a problem is the first and most important step of recovery. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
When it shines on things,
they are transformed.
- Thich Nhat Hahn
As they say in AA, admitting you have a problem is the first and most important step of recovery. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Friday, August 18, 2017
The Truth About Your Heart...
Your heart will fix itself.
It's your mind you need to worry about.
Your mind where you locked the memories,
your mind where you have kept pieces of the ones that hurt you,
that still cut through you like shards of glass.
Your mind will keep you up at night, make you cry,
destroy you over and over again.
You need to convince your mind that it has to let go...
because your heart already knows how to heal.
- Nikita Gill (28 year old London-based poet.After receiving 137 rejections from pubishers, this poet became a Tumblr and Instagram star)
So many helping professionals would agree. If we can pay attention to our thoughts, especially the negative and self-defeating ones, we may be able to avoid some of the pain in our lives. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
It's your mind you need to worry about.
Your mind where you locked the memories,
your mind where you have kept pieces of the ones that hurt you,
that still cut through you like shards of glass.
Your mind will keep you up at night, make you cry,
destroy you over and over again.
You need to convince your mind that it has to let go...
because your heart already knows how to heal.
- Nikita Gill (28 year old London-based poet.After receiving 137 rejections from pubishers, this poet became a Tumblr and Instagram star)
So many helping professionals would agree. If we can pay attention to our thoughts, especially the negative and self-defeating ones, we may be able to avoid some of the pain in our lives. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Thursday, August 17, 2017
Think faster?...
How to think faster:
1. Say 'Yes, and...
2. Relax your jaw, your mouth may talk on its own - body intellingence.
3. Work with the 1st thought that comes to mind - it is there for a reason.
4. If the other side is silent, let the silence be, don't feel like you have to fill in.
5. Repeat something several times while you are thinking.
6. Listen to your gut, it thinks faster than your brain.
7. Visualize your knee jerk, now produce a "mind jerk."
8. Follow the least effort principle.
- by Anna Vital (Funders and Founders)
Apparently we have a second kind of brain in our stomach, which may be more "attuned" than the one in our heads. Our actual thoughts tend to be burdened by fear and/or past experiences and trauma's. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
1. Say 'Yes, and...
2. Relax your jaw, your mouth may talk on its own - body intellingence.
3. Work with the 1st thought that comes to mind - it is there for a reason.
4. If the other side is silent, let the silence be, don't feel like you have to fill in.
5. Repeat something several times while you are thinking.
6. Listen to your gut, it thinks faster than your brain.
7. Visualize your knee jerk, now produce a "mind jerk."
8. Follow the least effort principle.
- by Anna Vital (Funders and Founders)
Apparently we have a second kind of brain in our stomach, which may be more "attuned" than the one in our heads. Our actual thoughts tend to be burdened by fear and/or past experiences and trauma's. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Wednesday, August 16, 2017
Loss of enthusiasm?...
Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.
- Unknown
Well, I think there's some loss of enthusiasm after a failure, whether you regularly wear teflon or not, ha ha ha. I guess the trick to it is to yell, cry, sulk, slump for a bit, then regroup and get back at it! Most importantly, if we're not compelled then maybe we need a new plan. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Unknown
Well, I think there's some loss of enthusiasm after a failure, whether you regularly wear teflon or not, ha ha ha. I guess the trick to it is to yell, cry, sulk, slump for a bit, then regroup and get back at it! Most importantly, if we're not compelled then maybe we need a new plan. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Tuesday, August 15, 2017
The Truth...
Speak the truth even if your voice shakes.
- Unknown
My favourite therapist says that speaking our truth is not only good for us, but for our friends and family as well. If we do things out of duty and obligation, we won't likely be able keep it up and we may end up resentful. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Unknown
My favourite therapist says that speaking our truth is not only good for us, but for our friends and family as well. If we do things out of duty and obligation, we won't likely be able keep it up and we may end up resentful. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Monday, August 14, 2017
How to have a simple life...
Let go of the past.
Say no when you mean it.
Turn off the phone.
Let go of perfectionism.
Purge your belongings.
Wear minimalist clothes.
Move closer to where you want to be.
Sever unhealthy relationships.
Have an alter-ego to deal with complicated things.
Walk more.
Run slowly and you'll get there faster.
- by Anna Vital (Funders and Founders)
We probably over function or under function in life. A relaxed balance would be nice. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Say no when you mean it.
Turn off the phone.
Let go of perfectionism.
Purge your belongings.
Wear minimalist clothes.
Move closer to where you want to be.
Sever unhealthy relationships.
Have an alter-ego to deal with complicated things.
Walk more.
Run slowly and you'll get there faster.
- by Anna Vital (Funders and Founders)
We probably over function or under function in life. A relaxed balance would be nice. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Sunday, August 13, 2017
Giving up part two...
I would add:
17. Victim
If we feel hard done by and really dig our heels in, I think we can end up spinning our wheels. A good therapist will help us get out of our own way and back to self-empowerment. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
17. Victim
If we feel hard done by and really dig our heels in, I think we can end up spinning our wheels. A good therapist will help us get out of our own way and back to self-empowerment. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Saturday, August 12, 2017
Giving up?...
Why people give up:
1. Expect fast results
2. Stop believing in themselves
3. Get stuck in the past
4. Dwell on mistakes
5. Fear the future
6. Resist change
7. Give up the power
8. Believe in their weaknesses
9. Feel the world owes them something
10. Fear failure more than desire success
11. Never visualize what is possible
12. Feel they have something to lose
13. Overwork
14. Assume their problems are unique
15. See failure as the signal to turn back
16. Feel sorry for themselves
- Unknown
It's a solo game. No one can make us do things we don't want to do. Either we're compelled, or we're not. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
1. Expect fast results
2. Stop believing in themselves
3. Get stuck in the past
4. Dwell on mistakes
5. Fear the future
6. Resist change
7. Give up the power
8. Believe in their weaknesses
9. Feel the world owes them something
10. Fear failure more than desire success
11. Never visualize what is possible
12. Feel they have something to lose
13. Overwork
14. Assume their problems are unique
15. See failure as the signal to turn back
16. Feel sorry for themselves
- Unknown
It's a solo game. No one can make us do things we don't want to do. Either we're compelled, or we're not. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Wednesday, August 9, 2017
How to start the day...
First thing successful people do in the morning:
1. Tackle the hardest problem on your plate (Mark Twain)
2. Visualize how you will make your day (Tony Robbins)
3. Work out. I do it just to clear my head and relieve me of stress (Barack Obama)
4. Don't check your email and do real work (David Karl)
5. Talk to customers. Customer service (Craig Newmark)
6. Every morning I ask myself: 'If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?' (Steve Jobs)
- Anna Vital (Founder at Adioma, Infographic author who runs Funders and Founders, where they explain things visually. Vital is a visionary and an influential member of the Silicon Valley tech community).
Two words come to mind; focus and commitment. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
1. Tackle the hardest problem on your plate (Mark Twain)
2. Visualize how you will make your day (Tony Robbins)
3. Work out. I do it just to clear my head and relieve me of stress (Barack Obama)
4. Don't check your email and do real work (David Karl)
5. Talk to customers. Customer service (Craig Newmark)
6. Every morning I ask myself: 'If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?' (Steve Jobs)
- Anna Vital (Founder at Adioma, Infographic author who runs Funders and Founders, where they explain things visually. Vital is a visionary and an influential member of the Silicon Valley tech community).
Two words come to mind; focus and commitment. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Tuesday, August 8, 2017
Apologies...
Things you don't need to apologize for:
1. Loving someone
2. Saying no
3. Following your dream
4. Taking "me" time
5. Your priorities
6. Ending a toxic relationship
7. Your imperfections
8. Standing your ground
9. Delay in your response
10. Telling the truth
- Compliments of @Lifehack
Somehow this feels so validating. Just sayin' :) Hugs
Blessings,
Chatgirl
1. Loving someone
2. Saying no
3. Following your dream
4. Taking "me" time
5. Your priorities
6. Ending a toxic relationship
7. Your imperfections
8. Standing your ground
9. Delay in your response
10. Telling the truth
- Compliments of @Lifehack
Somehow this feels so validating. Just sayin' :) Hugs
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Monday, August 7, 2017
Rule your mind...
Rule your mind or it will rule you.
- Buddha
Keep silencing the fear and doubt. Just sayin' ;)
Blessing,
Chatgirl
- Buddha
Keep silencing the fear and doubt. Just sayin' ;)
Blessing,
Chatgirl
Saturday, August 5, 2017
Imperfection is ok...
We fall short of our goals at times. Don't use imperfection as an excuse to quit trying to get healthy. If you get off course, re-focus and get right back to the objective at hand.
- Basheerah Ahmad (Masters in Organizational Development, Celebrity fitness expert, with a focus on youth mentorship and performing arts. Ahmad has dedicated her career to the world of obesity and injury prevention because she began to notice that many of her students were extremely talented, but not healthy. She says "an amazing life begins with being healthy!!!").
I wonder why we expect ourselves to be perfect? Just sayin' ;)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Basheerah Ahmad (Masters in Organizational Development, Celebrity fitness expert, with a focus on youth mentorship and performing arts. Ahmad has dedicated her career to the world of obesity and injury prevention because she began to notice that many of her students were extremely talented, but not healthy. She says "an amazing life begins with being healthy!!!").
I wonder why we expect ourselves to be perfect? Just sayin' ;)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Friday, August 4, 2017
Results...
Results are a function of behaviour, attitude and conditioning.
- Blair Singer (Best selling author, international key note speaker, seminar leader and consultant, who has helped tens of thousands of people increase their sales and income by 15%-85% in an average of 6 weeks. Singer helps develop the skills and mindset to achieve personal and professional goals that yield long-term results. He has shared the stage with Tony Robbins, Robert Kiyosaki, President Clinton, T.Hart Eker and other leaders in more than 35 countries).
Successful mentors do tend to advise that we take complete ownership and focus on; our thinking, our behaviour, our challenges and goal setting. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
- Blair Singer (Best selling author, international key note speaker, seminar leader and consultant, who has helped tens of thousands of people increase their sales and income by 15%-85% in an average of 6 weeks. Singer helps develop the skills and mindset to achieve personal and professional goals that yield long-term results. He has shared the stage with Tony Robbins, Robert Kiyosaki, President Clinton, T.Hart Eker and other leaders in more than 35 countries).
Successful mentors do tend to advise that we take complete ownership and focus on; our thinking, our behaviour, our challenges and goal setting. Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Thursday, August 3, 2017
Talk about joys...
Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction. Break the habit. Talk about your joys.
- Unknown
My favourite life coach says some of the most common coping mechanisms are; fight, flight, freeze, tend and befriend (complain to friends and family about our problems). They say "what you focus on expands." Just sayin' :)
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Wednesday, August 2, 2017
Believe, be patient, don't give up...
Good things come to those who Believe,
Better things come to those who are Patient,
and the best Things come to those who
Don't Give up.
- Unknown
Sounds easy, but for some reason it isn't, is it? So many things in life seem to take regular attention and focus. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Better things come to those who are Patient,
and the best Things come to those who
Don't Give up.
- Unknown
Sounds easy, but for some reason it isn't, is it? So many things in life seem to take regular attention and focus. Just sayin' :) Hugs.
Blessings,
Chatgirl
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)