Give it time...

In God’s time and in God’s way.

— Unknown

I grew up Catholic, but I’m more spiritual (Highest self/best self/Spirit within) as time passes. I’ve just found that some of the new age books/teachings offer helpful, present day, life coaching tips. One of my favourite books is The Abundance Book, by John Randolph Price. The information is potentially game-changing. He talks not so much about money per se, but our mentality around abundance and how to “attract” the things we want in life. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Can do’s!...

10 Things that require
 ZERO TALENT
  1. Being on time
  2. Making an effort
  3. Being high energy
  4. Having a positive attitude
  5. Being passionate.
  6. Using good body language
  7. Being coachable
  8. Doing a little extra
  9. Being prepared
10. Having a strong work ethic.

— Unknown

Amen to that. Just sayin ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Put everything into it...

Mickey Mantle is in Major League Baseball’s Hall of Fame. He had a spectacular 18-year career, winning the Most Valuable Player Award three times, playing in 12 World Series, and being selected to the All-Star team 16 times. So it’s astounding that he played with a torn ligament in his knee for 17 years, according to his biographer Jane Leavy. She quoted an orthopedic surgeon who said that Mantle compensated for his injury with “neuromuscular genius.”

— Rob Brezny, freewillastrology.com

Wow, that’s amazing. I wonder what we can overcome if we put our energy, hearts, minds (and spirit?) into it. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Growth Mindset...

Instead of thinking...      Think this instead:

I can’t do this!                What am I missing?
I’m not smart enough.    I will learn how to do this.
This is as good as it’s     Is this really my best work?
going to get!                   I can always improve.
I give up.                        I’ll try a different strategy and try again.
This is too hard.             This may take some time and effort.
I made a mistake.           Mistakes help me improve.

— Unknown

I’ve noticed something over the years. When I’ve lived on my own and there is absolutely no one available to help, I’ve surprised myself. First off, I’ve done things I would never have attempted (like putting in a dimmer, Lol). Second, (when desperate, he he), I realize I have the ability to figure things out with a little research, effort and time. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Go for great...

Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.

— John D. Rockefeller (American business magnate and philanthropist. He is widely considered the wealthiest American of all time, and the richest person in modern history. He founded the Standard Oil Company in 1870, which controlled 90% of all oil in the US at his peak. His fortune was mainly used to create the modern approach to philanthropy through the creation of foundations that had a major effect on medicine, education and scientific research).

It wasn’t until I gave up the good (good guy, but wrong match and a suffocating, but high paying job) that I found both my dream job and the love of my life. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Bring happiness...

Nothing can bring you happiness but yourself.

— Ralph Waldo Emerson (A Boston born, Harvard educated essayist, lecturer, philosopher, and poet who led the transcendentalist movement in his time. He was seen as a champion of individualism. He believed that all things are connected to God and, therefore all things are divine. Specifically, he stated “I believe in the ‘still, small voice,’ and that voice is Christ within us. Born 1803 and died 1882 at 78 years old).

My favourite therapist believes very strongly in Spirit, or our “Higher Self.” He says in his forty years of professional therapy/teaching, that overall his clients/patients have needed the support of a higher power in order to heal/grow/evolve and find greater happiness and a sense of well being. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Waking up early...

Why you should wake up at 4:30 am

• Waking up early in the morning was one of the secrets to success of successful people all around the world.
• If you start work in the morning you are more likely to finish it.
• Quietude. No kids yelling, no phone calls.
• When you wake up while others are sleeping your body tells you that you are a leader. This will boost your mentality, attitude and work ethic drastically.

— Hightop Business

Okay, well I don’t think I’m getting up at 4:30 am, Lol. I do however feel that my earlier morning (for me) routine has been a secret weapon over the last four years. I make time to read the paper and do a bit of writing, which is one of my favourite past times. This seems to set me up for a naturally productive day at work and life. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Searching for that one special person...

If you’re searching for that one person that will change your life,
look in the mirror.

— Unknown

My favourite therapist says that until we have completely faced ourselves and dealt with whatever baggage we may be carrying around, odds are we’ll struggle with our closest relationships. I was inspired to deal with some of my old stuff after a bad break up and it most certainly paid off. I realized my “list” needed work. I needed to be way more honest about what I like doing/not doing/deal breakers/must have’s. After that, Mr Right showed up within a year. Pretty awesome. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Start now...

Start now. Start where you are.
Start with fear. Start with pain.
Start with doubt. Start with hands shaking.
Start with voice trembling, but start.
Start and don’t stop.
Start where you are, with what you have.
Just...Start.

— Unknown

My favourite therapist would say start anything that makes our lives better, no matter how small. For example, a savvy personal trainer advises if we do nothing else (same diet, same activity level), just add an extra vegetable a day and drink more water. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs.

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Don’t quit...

It’s a slow process, but quitting won’t speed it up.

— Unknown

From everything I’ve read about manifesting what we want, a few things stand out; write them down and revisit them often, surrender the when, keep the faith. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Habits to help you prosper...

Network.
Dream big.
Plan ahead.
Get up early.
Stay focused.
Watch less TV.
Invest in yourself.
Read more books.
Avoid time wasters.
Take calculated risks.
Write down your goals.
Live on less than you make.
Make your health your priority.
Do work that matters to you.
Learn from people you admire.
Foster meaningful relationships.
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude.
Take action, even when it’s scary.
Have a powerful and inspiring “why.”

— Ruben Chavez (Founder of ThinkGrowProsper, successful online business owner)

I have a feeling that to do any of this at all, we have to be genuinely inspired. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Positive thinking...

Positive thinking will let you do everything better than negative thinking will.

— Zig Ziglar

I read an article (in Psychology Today I think) that talked about coping strategies. The therapist explained that some people are cautious and “realistic” because they don’t want to feel disappointed. Conversely, optimists use positivity to cope. I’m the latter because positive thinking just makes me feel better. There is also much evidence to support the link between optimism and good outcomes. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Painful patterns...

How to Let Go of a Painful Pattern

You need to recognize that you developed certain patterns of behavior due to “belief programming” you absorbed from those around you in the past - or because these behaviors kept you from feeling unwanted anxiety and hurt. You must now recognize that these old patterns of behavior are not working for you in your present. At this point, they are causing more harm than good. You must accept that if you keep doing what you're always doing you will keep getting what you’re always getting.

— Karen Salmansohn (Best selling self-help book author and award-winning designer with about 2 million books sold internationally. She has 1.3 million Facebook fans and 3.1 million views on Pinterest. She is the founder of notsalmon.com, a personal development site, which offers books and video courses on topics such as anxiety, emotional eating, relationships, meditation and happiness. Salmansohn was previously a Senior VP and Creative Director who left her job to pursue writing. She has been profiled in the NY Times, Business Week, Time Magazine and has appeared in popular TV shows).

My favourite therapist says our childhood “programming” is particularly difficult to affect because we can’t process our emotions when we’re young, impressionable and still developing. He says these stuck feelings are the crux of the issue and tend to be bigger than us. Odds are we could benefit from some assistance in sorting some of the old stuff out. Kinda like cleaning out the attic, or getting rid of clothes that no longer fit. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Motivation and habits...

Motivation gets you going and habit gets you there.

— Zig Ziglar (For his talent and genius, Ziglar is recognized as one of the greatest motivational speakers ever).

Maybe the trick is finding out exactly what motivates us. Just sayin ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Everything we hear...

Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact.
Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.

— Marcus Aurelius

Apparently, we process what we see and hear through the lenses of our past experiences, upbringing, beliefs and values. Research is clear that “eyewitness identification is vulnerable to distortion even without the witness’s awareness.” I know my memory is anything but photographic, Lol. So maybe we could afford to leave a little breathing room for our less than perfect memories and honest misunderstandings. (Ps. I’ll try to remember to calm my emotions first and then consider both sides, or three sides of every story, ha ha).  Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Love yourself...

Love yourself when you’re tired.
Love yourself when you’re weak.
Love yourself when you’re confused.
Love yourself when you’re broken.
Love yourself until you’re restored.

— Unknown

My favourite therapist says we have to love and protect the most vulnerable (scared and weak?) part of ourselves, the Inner Child. Joel Brass offers seminars that address the emotional pain of the past that may be challenging and potentially defeating our most important relationships. He says that “Our lives are shaped, in almost equal measure, by those who have loved us and by those who couldn’t love us.” I’ve done some of the workshops and my relationships have most certainly been transformed, and so have I. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

What it’s built for...

A ship is always safe at shore.
But that is not what it’s built for.

— Albert Einstein

My favourite therapist says it all starts with our deepest truths. He says once we are willing to be completely honest with ourselves, and then others, we will find a deeper sense of safety and security to strike out from. (Ps. In my experience, it’s a bit of a process, but the progress is quite tangible). Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Lack of friendship...

It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.

— Friedrich Nietzsche

I had the most romantic love affair when I was younger. We played like a couple of kids on weekends and enjoyed fun evenings and get-aways. We didn’t notice the disagreements and disconnect on day-to-day matters unfortunately and got married. We soon faced insurmountable obstacles and the marriage ended within a few years. We’re still on good terms and when we ran into each other recently we talked about what went wrong. For me, I said it just seemed that we couldn’t get on the same side. Fortunately, I learned from that lesson and set out to find a more compatible and cooperative dynamic. Miraculous! Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

What if...

What if ...

everything you are going through is preparing you for what you asked for?

— Unknown

My last job was the most unpleasant of my career; very micro-managey, stressful to the max, ruled by fear and intimidation, odd in that management wanted a heavy admin focus, which was not typical. I was angry and frustrated. I wanted to quite the whole time, but it paid well and jobs were scarce post-2008 financial crash. I finally landed a new job and it’s the best of my life by a long shot. Before long, I created some analytic tools to maximize my strategies and planning. The company was thrilled and rolled out one of my ideas to the team. I would never have deferred to an admin approach in my job, as it’s never been my strong suit. I realized my worst job of all prepared me for the best years of my career, and the most money I’ve ever made. Go figure! Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Just because it hurts...

Just because a decision hurts, doesn’t mean that it was the wrong decision.

— Unknown

I wish I could tell my younger self that. I found it tremendously difficult to break up, even when I realized the relationship wasn’t suiting me. On a good note, once I figured out what I needed and wanted (with much detail and specificity), it was easier to move forward and find my great match. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Live in such a way...

Live in such a way that if someone spoke badly of you no one would believe it.

— Unknown

I strive to be open-minded and non-judgmental because I like the humanity in tolerance and acceptance (to self and others). Thing is, I still catch myself judging and critiquing. It kinda drives me crazy actually. My favourite therapist would say that’s just ego talking, as our ego’s tend to lead with a colder, more calculating mindset. He says we also have access to our more spiritual side (our highest or best self), our mature/adult self and our inner child, who is more accommodating, playful and fun, so hopefully it all balances out. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Pure and perfect?...

No one in this world is pure and perfect. If you avoid people for their mistakes, you will be alone in this world. So judge less and love more.

— Buddha Daily

Actually, what I’ve learned from many, many sources is that the person we most need to forgive and love is ourselves. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Your future self...

Do something today that your future self will thank you for.

— Unknown

For a long time I heard people say things like “you have to go inward” and “you have to invest in yourself” and “you have to love yourself first”. I didn’t understand what all of this meant and I certainly didn’t know how to go about it... until life threw some big curve balls in career, love and money. I went back to the drawing board, worked with a couple of savvy mentors and took a fresh approach. Without really thinking about it, I made life altering commitments to myself; I focused on accomplishing meaningful results each and every day at work, I cleaned up my diet with a couple of extra healthy choices per day, I made a more honest account of the life I wanted to lead and the kind of partner who would compliment my future and I put my health and well-being at the top of my priorities. The results were quite astounding. All of my dreams (that I had clearly identified) came true within eleven months and life continues to get better and better. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Finding yourself...

If you lose someone but found yourself,
You won.

— Unknown

I really envy people who meet their soulmate young and have a long and happy relationship life. I learned by trial and error unfortunately, Lol. It wasn’t until my last break up that I put it all together. I realized I had to be more honest with myself about what I like/want and don’t want/like. Once I had a comprehensive vision of the life I wanted to lead, Mr Right miraculously showed up. We like to do the same things, we have similar views/goals/dreams/values, we believe in treating others well and we feel that work/life balance is hugely important and on and on. In others words, we’re a perfect match! Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Gratitude or regret?...

Dead people receive more flowers than the living ones because regret is stronger than gratitude.

— Anne Frank

I had an ongoing battle with my father. He couldn’t seem to stop telling me what to do and how I should be. I found it frustrating and felt he was insulting my intelligence. I mean, did he think I had no sense whatsoever. Then he died at 59. The shock sent a disruptive ripple through our entire family that took years to heal. I’ve heard that mourning can take on many forms and I was most surprised by my own reaction. In truth, I thought the end of my father’s criticisms and judgments would be freeing. In reality, I just felt numb. I spent a few years reliving the past and going through the five established emotions of grief; denial/isolation, anger, depression, bargaining, and finally acceptance. Amazingly enough, I began to miss those little debates we would have. My father was suspect of business because he felt there was an overriding element of greed. Fair enough, except my career and livelihood is in business, which I love. Another standard grievance of his was anything less than perfection, which is an impossible standard of course. What I’ve come to realize is that yes, my father was a tough nut, but he was also just trying to teach me and protect me. He didn’t want me to learn the hard way. Coming full circle, I would give anything to hear more of my father’s sometimes annoying and frustrating thoughts. With sufficient life experience under my belt, I can finally appreciate all he taught me. I continue to notice the pearls of wisdom that I learned from him. Thank you Dad. I love you.

Blessings,

Chatgirl