Old fear...

Old fear cannot see new things.

— Unknown

My favourite therapist says some of our early childhood experiences may actually be running the show, particularly in our primary relationships. He says we are overly vulnerable to traumatic moments in childhood because we are unable to understand and process our feelings at the time. He says that professional intervention can be very helpful in uncovering and releasing old wounds, and positively affect our relationships and lives in general. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

To do list...

Things to do today:

1. get up
2. survive
3. go back to bed

Lol. But seriously, some days are bigger than us aren’t they. After all, there’s only so much we can control. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Just breathe...

Sometimes it’s okay if the only thing you did today was breathe.

— Unknown

Ekhart Tolle says “do not resist” what life brings. Makes me feel better about the impossible days when I just wanna duck and hide. Fewf. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

All of a sudden...

Everything will happen for you all of a sudden and you will be thankful you didn’t give up.
Blessings are coming. Believe that.

— Unknown

The shittiest thing happened to me many years ago. Thankfully I chose to learn from it and focus on the big things I wanted in life. I’m still amazed at how decisions turned into commitments, which turned into the most bountiful blessings of my life. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

What I say and do...

Sometimes, I shock myself with the smart stuff I say and do.
Other times, I try to get out of the car with my seat belt on.

— Unknown

That makes me feel so much better, Lol. My Dad used to tease me mercilessly for my silly flub ups (I’m a klutz to say the least!). I think we can go into auto pilot, thinking about something else. Maybe Ekhart Tolle is onto something with The Power of Now and being in the moment. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Who you were...

Who you were, who you are, and who you will be are three different people.

— Unknown

We lose innocence and naïveté along the way, but hopefully not our spirit. There’s something to be said for knowing you can survive and thrive. I sometimes wish I could talk to my younger self and help make her journey easier. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Pain and gain...

First it hurts,
then it changes you.

— Unknown

Traditionally, I have resisted change. It’s weird because the big changes have been a breath of fresh air in the end, with much needed growth. When I look back on the painful transitions, I remember feeling temporarily out of sorts, with a vague sense of emotional homelessness. On that uncertain path, however, unexpected opportunities presented awakening and fulfilling new directions (including the career of my dreams and the love of my life). Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Change is painful...

Growth is painful.
Change is painful.
But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don’t belong.

— Unknown

Boy did I learn this lesson the hard way. I stayed too long in a relationship and in a career position and both cost me! I guess I thought I’d have more time to decide. Thing is, if we don’t make the decision, someone else will make it for us and maybe not in the way we would have wanted. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Approving of yourself...

Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.

— Louise Hay

My favourite therapist says we should pay close attention to what we’re telling ourselves and to how we’re feeling. He strongly recommends writing this stuff down, to help process and release some of our niggling emotions. Just sayin’ :)

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Seeing things differently...

Here’s to the crazy ones,
the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers,
the round pegs in the square holes...
the ones who see things differently —
they’re not fond of rules... you can quote them, disagree with them,
glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do
is ignore them because they change things...
They push the human race forward,
and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius,
because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can
change the world, are the ones who do.

— Steve Jobs

Maybe we just need to figure out who we really are and then fully embrace our individuality. Just sayin’ :) Hugs.

Blessings,

Chatgirl

New beginnings...

New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.

— Lao Tzu (Ancient philosopher and writer. He is a semi-legendary figure and generally portrayed as a contemporary of Confucius. His work was embraced by both anti-authoritarian movements and Chinese Legalism. He believed that limiting the role of government and allowing individuals to develop spontaneously would best achieve social and economic harmony).

My most brilliant outcomes have come from challenging and uncomfortable changes and transitions. I must keep reminding myself of this because I still seem resistant to change. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

I have the power...

Almost every successful person begins with two beliefs:
1) The future can be better than the present.
2) I have the power to make it so.

— Unknown

They say we have to see “it” happening first and then we can materialize our desired outcome. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

I did it myself...

“I am thankful to all those who said NO. Because of them, I did it myself.”

— Einstein

I’ve found myself floundering without assistance on a few occasion and it’s interesting to observe. We can be pretty resourceful when absolutely necessary. It’s confidence inspiring. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Continuous improvement...

Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection.

— Mark Twain (Writer, entrepreneur, publisher and lecturer, who was lauded as the “greatest humorist this country has produced”. He is best known for The Adventures of  Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn. William Faulkner called him “the father of American Literature”.)

Steve Jobs had a similar philosophy, knowing new products would never launch if perfection was the threshold. Interestingly enough, he was a perfectionist himself, and he wanted to launch products that were as perfect as possible. Striving for the highest quality in whatever we do is a wonderful goal. I think the big challenge can be making important decisions and then getting started. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

A better person...

Your beliefs don’t make you a better person, your behaviour does.

— Unknown

I have to say, when I made myself fully accountable, all of my dreams came true. I had a super bad experience, got mad at myself and went cold turkey on letting things just happen to me. I made a list of thoughtful goals, set up a day-to-day plan and stuck to it. It took about a year and then everything fell into place. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

A meaningful life...

A meaningful life is not about being rich, being popular, being highly educated or being perfect...
It is about being real, being humble, being strong and being able to share ourselves and touch the lives of others.

— Unknown

I get that. We still want things though (a spacious home, warm vacations, nice clothes, devices etc.) and those things require money and the means of earning that living (cost of education, starting a business etc.) My favourite therapist says our ego can get ahold of these desires and ambitions and drive us harder than our heart and personal life may really need for our well being. Just sayin’ ;) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Sparks a light...

You often feel tired, not because you’ve done too much, but because you’ve done too little of what sparks a light in you.

— Unknown

Ain’t that the truth. My favourite therapist talks a lot about honouring ourselves and meeting our own needs ahead of duty and obligation. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Switch your mentality...

Switch your mentality from
“I’m broken and helpless”
to
“I’m growing and healing”
and watch how your life changes for the better

— Unknown

My favourite therapist says we typically need to resolve some old stuff on the road to healing. We may also need some assistance in processing our emotional baggage, and that’s ok. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Caring for self...

It is not selfish to do what is best for you.

— Unknown

My favourite therapist says if we are true to ourselves and we draw healthy boundaries, our loved ones will adjust in kind. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

True mark of maturity...

The true mark of maturity is when somebody hurts you and you try to understand their situation instead of trying to hurt them back.

— Unknown

Yes, that would be very mature of us indeed, Lol;) Forgiveness seems to be a process however (and may require the assistance of a professional?). I’ve been working on it for a while, with those who’ve hurt me most. It leaves such a bad taste doesn’t it? Just sayin’ :) Hugs.

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Die a little...

Sometimes you just have to die a little inside in order to be reborn and rise again as a stronger and wiser version of you.

— Unknown

I’ve experienced two such deaths. The first happened post-2008 financial crisis, when I suffered the loss of my new, fancy, high paying job at the worst possible time. A hiring freeze ensued for two to three years and I was stuck earning half of my usual salary in the only job I could get. Ugggh. The other was completely my fault because I delayed and avoided facing the reality that my four year relationship was at an end. I paid for that inaction dearly. Happily, the silver lining for my little deaths has been transformative in every way. I now pay close attention, face facts, act quickly and take ownership of everything in my life. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Be done...

Sometimes you just have to be done.
Not mad, not upset.
Just done.

— Unknown

I am hugely grateful for being done with the wrong relationships. When I stopped, took a break, thought carefully about the kind of life I want to live and how I want to feel with my ideal partner, everything changed. (Ps. I also had help from a few savvy coaches along the way). I met the perfect love of my life and I’ve never looked back. Just sayin’ :) Hugs. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl

Love can do that...

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that.
Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

— Martin Luther King Jr. (Minister and activist. King was an outstanding student and skipped ninth and twelfth grades. He entered Morehouse College at age 15 by passing an entrance exam. He earned a BA and then a PhD from Boston University. King became known early on for his public-speaking ability. What is not commonly known - King suffered from depression through much of his life and at age 12 jumped out of a second story window because he blamed himself for his grandmother’s death. King was initially skeptical of many of Christianity’s claims, but later concluded that the Bible has “many profound truths which one cannot escape” and that the church offered the most assuring way to answer “an inner urge to serve humanity.” On October 14 1964 King won the Nobel Peace Price for combating racial inequality through nonviolent resistance.)

My favourite therapist says we have to first reconcile our own darkness, and then we may realize a greater capacity for others. Just sayin’ :) Hugs.

Blessings,

Chatgirl