Saturday, May 10, 2025

Habits with the highest rate of return in life…

1. Exercise daily, it pays off in health and energy.
2. Keep learning, growth is a lifelong journey.
3. Sleep is an investment in your productivity.
4. Practice mindfulness for peace and focus.
5. Financial discipline today ensures freedom tomorrow. 
6. Master time, and you master your life.
7. Read daily, expand your mind.
8. Set goals and create your future.
9. Build connections, they open doors.
10. Gratitude turns ordinary days into extraordinary ones.
11. Reflect often to improve constantly.
12. Learn to say no, protect your time.
13. Eat well, live well.
14. Journal to clear your mind and grow.

— Unknown

I was a late learner in finances. My father was a teacher and my mother never worked, so resources were scarce, and we were usually in debt. So no money management tips from the upbringing. But after losing my fancy, well paying job due to the 2008 financial crisis, I read Suze Orman’s book The 9 Steps to Financial Freedom, and began following much of her guidance. In a nutshell, I learned to save up for any big purchases, including vacations. I also pre-load a couple of credit cards. Spending money hugely lost it’s appeal after facing such a stressful financial crisis. And now seeing my bank balance grow, and interest earned, is way more exciting than buying a new pair of shoes, or what have you. Just sayin’ :) Hugs and good luck. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl 


 

Friday, May 9, 2025

Ask for it…

Ask for healing, clarity, peace, wisdom, and guidance. Ask for abundance, creativity, light and love. Don’t be timid in your prayers or your request. Be bold. Be positive. Be grateful as everything you’re asking for is already making its way to you. 

— Unknown (via @Law.of.Attraction1111)

When I was going through my bad break up, I read a ton of books, with one standing above the rest. Ask and It Is Given, by Esther and Jerry Hicks, became my lifeline. The teachings helped me focus on and clarify what I wanted, which strengthened my inner resolve. I’ve always been a positive, glass-half-full person, but I achieved a better mental and emotional foundation, by incorporating many of the teachings into my morning writing ritual. Most of my dreams have since come true, and I continue to be proactive in manifesting my ultimate dream life. Just sayin’ :) Hugs and good luck. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl  

Thursday, May 8, 2025

How people make you feel…

People that love you, care about how they make you feel.

The end.

— Unknown 

This is a very interesting discussion. On the surface, I agree. And I spent far too much time around people who made me feel bad (including some family). But after spending years in therapy and in relationship skills/group therapy workshops, I also know it’s not that simple. We can be boxed in my upbringing. We can box people out because of upbringing. We can rely on outdated coping mechanisms because of upbringing. And all of these things can prevent us from loving others (and ourselves) properly. For example, I used to go pretty silent and sort of paralyzed when I felt hurt, which is the most unhelpful thing ever for a relationship. And so I needed to learn, and did learn fortunately, how to articulate what was going on for me, and make requests on my behalf. What a game changer for your partner and for the health and happiness of your relationship(s). Just sayin’ ;) Hugs and good luck. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl 

Sunday, May 4, 2025

This need for certainty that we all have…

Rather than 

trying to know and figure it all out, live in the curiosity of it all. You don’t have to know where you’ll be a year from now, you don’t even have to know what you’ll be doing a month from now. Move away from this need for certainty that we all have, and move toward the curiosity that we all need. Just be. Live in the moment with every bit of your life force, and enjoy the gift of the present. The treasures of your life will present themselves to you only if you really are open to them. 

— Robin Sharma  

I don’t know about you, but I felt lighter reading this. We can’t predict what’s going to happen, and worrying is down right exhausting. Just sayin’ :) Hugs and good luck. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl 

Saturday, May 3, 2025

Respond, don’t react…

When you react to something someone says or does, you may have a problem with boundaries. If someone is able to cause havoc by doing or saying something, she is in control of you at that point and your boundaries are lost. 

When you respond, you remain in control with options and choices. If you feel yourself reacting, step away and regain control of yourself so family members can’t force you to do or say something you do not want to do or say; and something that violates your separateness. 

When you have kept your boundaries, choose the best option. The difference between responding and reacting is choice. When you are reacting, they are in control. When you respond, you are.

— Dr Henry Cloud and Dr Joh Townsend (Book: Boundaries) 

For me, establishing healthy boundaries and learning to respond, rather than react, took therapy. Much therapy. And relationship skills education. I simply didn’t learn this stuff at home. I also had certain hot buttons, due to unresolved emotional trauma from the past (For example, my father was a tyrant who insulted my intelligence regularly). Therapy’s been cool, because now I’m able to listen with curiosity, and an interest in learning, rather than taking everything personally. Just sayin’ :) Hugs and good luck. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl 



Friday, May 2, 2025

Avoid emotional dumpers?…

Emotional dumping!

1) Is talking about the sample issues over and over again

2) Leaves you feeling drained and overwhelmed

3) Doesn’t show respect for your emotional space

4) If often one-sided and goes on and on

5) Involves getting stuck in a cycle of complaints 

6) Leaves no room for solutions or accountability

— @heybobbibanks

Oh man. I’ve faced loads of this over the years. Fortunately, when my mother passed away my tolerance absolutely cratered, and much of this (negativity, complaining and blaming) fell by the way side. I am now surrounded by those focused on health, accountability and a more positive existence. It’s nice. Just sayin’ :) Hugs and good luck. XO

Blessings,

Chatgirl